Frantic Efforts to Avoid Abandonment, Real or Imagined

Once I wove flowers into his bicycle spokes.

I wrote PLEASE on the wall in large letters.

I wrote letters.

Many times I made a scene.

Once I cast a spell.

I told him I could keep him beautiful.

I chased after him in the street, calling his name.

I was always It.

I showed up at the party knowing he would be there and went home with him.

I showed up at the party not knowing he would be there and went home with him.

I texted twice more after it was clear he didn’t want to sleep with me again.

I learned about sympathetic magic in class, then got his signature tattooed on my ass.

I followed him onto the subway platform.

I followed him on every platform.

I told him I would die without him.

I died.

That was the worst thing.

No, coming back was the worst thing.

Haunting him.

I wore a disguise.

Sang the Stevie Nicks song right in his face.

You’ll never get away from the sound of the woman that loves you.

I paid for it.

Slept with his friend.

Several of them.

Claimed squatter’s rights.

I waited by the door.

I wrapped my arms around him.

I turned him into a tree.

I climbed.

Carved our initials into the bark.

I jumped.

Where I landed I didn’t know the language.

I repeated his name in a mirror until he appeared.

I broke the mirror trying to get to him.

I broke two.

I turned him into a flower.

I turned him into a pig.

I cooked him breakfast.

I did the dishes.

I learned the language.

I devised a plot.

I devised a plot of such sophistication he’d never suspect.

I stole his passport.

I made everyone he loved love me.

Once I told the truth about everything.

I lied.

I was extravagant.

I was simple.

I was a good piece of furniture.

I was his favorite shirt.