Heaven's Throat

Here I present my work alongside that of others which inspires me in a manuscript in progress as I return to the origin of my poetic practice–doodling and writing bored in church. I’m driven to explore themes of loss, materiality of language, the hidden spectacle, and the pentecostal nonlinearity of time. This playlist features Aída Cartagena Portalatín (Dominican Republic), César Vallejo (Peru), Ḥamda bint Ziyād al-Muaddib (Moorish Andalusia) with classical and modern translations, and Jay Wright (US).

Prayer

with      center      everywhere      and circumference  nowhere  /  we  find proof  of  your  broken  promise /

 

what  does  it  mean  for  a  prophecy to    come    true    in    reverse   /   the weeping   archive   empties   out  the holy     /     we     are     stronger    than paradise /

 

 

like perfect lovers the clocks always unsync / within us the endless dead are waking a likeness /

 

 

papá   legbá   says   sotto   voce   /   all writing    is   pig   shit  /  since   these symbols and all symbols are drawn / infinity's      separation      from       all symbols   must   be   shown  through drawing /  

 

 

Asemic writing on looseleaf paper

Okra

My presence dissolveswe live in the lungs of a wormchance operations with a text bearing my mother’s namePoor rocks they found and consoledthe remains of a poor man’s worshipWe let the rain pass over usthe dreams of falling molars and wedding dressesthe tombstones writhing up out the ground like tongueschasing our soul familiesWe swallow our shadowswhile they put rocks in hats and twiddlea soul child has monstrous moonshine for blooda seed from the moon that backtalked the fireLet us trace the outline of the molondronesfuturepast of social architecturesKingelez says nobody is good enough for his dream citiesThe falling molar says nobodyThe molondron says no

Of the lack of you

The lack of you has never been alone:your memory is the passport to my journeys.If your absence were the absence of others,and I presaged you like a distant star, hesitant–then the lack of you wouldn’t be absenceit would be death's pain.You word was more than a wordand I idolized you in my burning temple,where we'll be forever... Death!If your absence hadn't eternalized,like a light or a shadow,I wouldn't be absent.In one continuous journey I'd go toward you,chasing your presence.

To Alice Coltrane Turiyasangitananda

In sorrow for the burned Sai Anantam ashramthe lilith moon of your harplilt and angle of alignéd planets thrum your namein concentric co-harmonic spirals, falling upwardSaint John lived in your negative harmonyconflagrated pianos blossom from your every stepancestors blessed you with the reverse memoryA fractal geometry of lineages reflected in abstractionthe sound of light itselftears fall to my feet like a wriggling bugthis bottomless well of loneliness could be a neighborI gently smash lilacs against my face calling out to youdynastic– like the city inside the yucca–

Mangulina

puckered moon trades its craw for an ocean plumthere is rebirth and an image of rebirththe soul of the woman at the bus stopis from the crow we buried in my backyardlike the grave, the scene of writing is a quiet placelet a soul take flight as it tongues the cruxthe rain sounds like typing, the voice in my headhas your accentcoy with the luminosity of a tardigrade on the moonhalf unfelt gesture, half ungestured feelingrampart of sighsthe network stands in for the utterance… … … …the air itself is an archive…the song is the bird…In a sense, a film is most perfect before anyone sees it

“And if after so many words…”

   And if after so many words,the word itself does not survive!If after the wings of the birds,The bird at rest doesn’t survive!It would be better, really,for everything to be consumed and finished.   To have been born to live off our death!To rise up from heaven toward earththrough one’s own disasters, to witnessthe moment one’s shadow snuffs out one’s darkness!It would be better, frankly,for it all to be gobbled up, and who cares!   And if after so much history, we succumbfrom eternity no longer,but from those simple things, like beingat home or ruminating!And if later we find,all of a sudden, that we are alive,judging by the height of the stars,by the comb and the stain on the handkerchief!It would be better, indeed,for everything to be extinguished, of course!   They’ll say we havein one eye much sorrowas well in the other, much sorrowand in both, when they witness, much sorrow…As such!… Of course!… Then… not a word!

“Tears have betrayed my secrets…”

Tears have betrayed my secrets in a wadi [valley] whose beauty is striking;A river surrounds every meadow; and every meadow borders every wadi;Among the gazelle, a black fawn stole my mind, after stealing my heart;She desires to lie down for a reason, and that reason prevents my sleep;When she loosens her tufts, I see the full moon in the black clouds,As if the dawn had lost a brother, and in sorrow, clothed itself in mourning.

“Tears have betrayed my secrets…”

my tears reveal my secretsin a wadi with traces of beautyrivers encircling gardensgardens encircling riversamong the gazelles, a sweet doe,full of milk, has grasped my hearther gaze keeps me from sleepingwhen she lets down her hairyou see the moon on a dark horizonas though dawn has lost a brotherand put on mourning clothes

Future memory poem

This poem consists of the next thing you will forget.

Untitled, for Maria Abréu (Clouds)

Hated the sound of grandma crying, the crooked letter /You could see it in the ground or where the sky thunders– Vast Aire

Raincloudsseem                 to soak in the cold–                 Inchoate protective gesture–[more distant sense of seeming]           Clouds have two faces, two pants                                                                              asking who watches over them

[not spoke but more diffuse]                   Last time we spoke                                                                              we had to invent verbs[sigil of crooked letter]                               Clouds rain because they can’t                                                                               keep their secrets any longer.

The twelve prickly eyes of guanábana                                                             [soursop, Annona muricata]              which speak for timelessness                                                               [locus, bohío]              for the genius of manioc’s detoxification                                         [city, heaven’s throat]turn to me and ask:              when the dust-soaked ground cracks open and sucks up the houses your son built              who will contain the melodies, the souls, the names in me?and butterfly wing chokes:              Archangel Raphael lives under sweet water with bonedeep music              while your mother holds you by a string in the stinging light

The prickles add up                                                                                                  [la voz falla]to the exact # of hummingbird bones needed                                             [con tanta luz]to build a bridge de tu casita a la mía                                                               [mil silencios caídos]

Veil, I

There is something about the blood in a sunsetthat answers no questions;the tarnished veil of a halo refers usto a dream we never had;and whatever wakes in uswhen the unseen loon callsoffers no consolation.Can I speak of the heart here,when nothing speaks to it?Can the night’s brush uncover crystals of longing,that master moon hides and rocks in the beech?Given such suspicion,it is too early to submit to the darkness.You must commit yourself to the light’s weave,the distant clarity of a promise you may have                                                                          misunderstood.

Go on;the sunset’s veronica’d bloodpromises consonance.You will learn the veils’s appeal to the light in you.

Untitled, or Heaven’s Throat (for NH Pritchard)

to             oma                     nyp        roph     e             tsc                    amew      i           themp               iret                 h             iste                        rr           orth       a                       tgo                        dnev                  erspoketh        rou                      ghth                      em                       Y                            etso                   met     hin                                gha                       sspo                      ke                     nthr         um                     e… i     fthere                         w           ere                         atr                        uech                    urc       h           wou                 ldy                                                                                                                                                             ouwantto                                   bepa                      rto           f           i            t                             Ar         eal        lch                 urc        hesab                 omi        n                           ati        ons                        t            o            Go                              d           I                              nth          e                        te            m                        pl                 e                           ‘sfre                                        tt                                                                    i                 n         gsha                      d                           o                                            w–                         la garganta del cielo–ter                                          riblee                                                  m                          p            ti                        n                 essof                                  G                                                                                                     o            d’sfulln           ess         t            h                              ecol        dglo                  ryofw                               or           ldas                 str                                       u                               ctu                                                                               reYouar                      edri                      ve            ntok                    nowth                e             incess                            ant       d                                               eadso u                           l             schai                 nedin        y                                          ouMys                                               te                                      riesyo                                              d             on’                                                       t              wantsurr                ou                        nd                            ther                                   e                        alSp                 acecu                 rv                            estov     o                                          idlac                kstructu                         resti                                     meInth                            een                        dwh                 atcou                  ld                            p             o            ssi                                 b                          litybe                                                c              o                                                                                                                       mebu                   tlan                    guageT                                 h                              ereisant              ui                                     t                 i              veli                     nkbe                        twe                    enmim                           ic                                              ki                            n                             gna                       turestab                                                       lis                                                        hin                                    ga                mel                                                                        o                                        dyan    dutter                         in                                         gac                                      ompl etes        e                                           nte                                        nce