a light&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;a burning haibun



a burning Haibun is a poetic form invented by Torrin L. Greathouse.&nbsp; In a burning haibun, 
the poet writes a prose poem, that erases into a poem, that erases into a haiku.

&nbsp;


&nbsp;

when i met god i lied and kept going.&nbsp; when i met god i gave her five dollars.&nbsp; i said sorry that&rsquo;s all i got,
n kept going.&nbsp; when god asked for my name i could barely hear myself.&nbsp; when god left i finished my 
churro and my pizza and lit my last spliff.&nbsp; when god waved goodbye to me, i smiled back at her and 
adjusted the box of stolen panties in my bag.&nbsp; when god watched me go, i had numbers on my mind. 
this number for that day and that number for this day and that day for these numbers and these 
numbers for those days and those days for some number.&nbsp; i don&rsquo;t know enough to care. god laughed 
and grabbed her lovers ass while i rushed off. god will i be rich? and god, if i am rich, will i be gracious 
enough to not lie when you ask for a dollar? how many dollars will you ask for before i lie? how many 
dollars will you ask for before i ask you for a dollar?&nbsp; how many dollars will i ask for before you lie? 
god? god you&rsquo;re not listening, are you? god, are you in love? god? god will the earth flood again? god? 
god will babylon fall? god where will we go when the tower wrecks on shoreless seas? god? god? god?
do i have to choose, god, between love and a dollar? that is the only choice, isn&rsquo;t it?&nbsp; to love a day. oh 
god. to love a day enough to not ask for another. oh god. the sun, god, the sun keeps rising. god, i 
promised my mother&rsquo;s dog i would introduce her to another dawn. you understand, don&rsquo;t you? why 
did i lie? god what am i supposed to do? give every dollar to every voice that asks? god knows my 
pocket would be lighter. god, have i known suffering? god, this that i have known- is it suffering?&nbsp; 
god? god could you show me something? we&rsquo;ll make a trade. i&rsquo;ll show you every use for a dollar and 
you&rsquo;ll show me every use for a lighter.

_______________________________________________________________________________________


when i met god i lied&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;i gave her five dollars&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; said sorry

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; and kept going.

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;my last spliff&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; waved goodbye to

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; numbers.

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; these numbers&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;don&rsquo;t&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; care&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; enough&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; to&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;lie.

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; how many dollars&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; will you ask for

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;before

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; the&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; flood(?)

when the tower wrecks&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;choose

between love and a dollar&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;

a light

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; THE COLONIZER STRETCHES OUT BENEATH US

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; BASKING IN THE LIGHT.

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; THE COLONIZER WHISPERS SWEET NOTHINGS,

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; ASKS US TO SAY OUR NAMES.

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;ASKS US TO SAY OUR NAMES.



the colonizer tenses. eyes become tight as a needle. you pass thru like a rich man into heaven.

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; U ARE WITHIN THE NEW WOMB;

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; THE MIND OF THE GREAT CAT,

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; THE GREED DEMON

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; IN ITS NINTH LIFE,

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; SLAIN EIGHT THOUSAND

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;TIMES &amp;

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;PURRING

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; TOWARDS THE VOID.



&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; U ARE WITHIN THE NEW WOMB.

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; THE FOUNDRY OF THE FUTURE.

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; THE ASSEMBLY LINE OF TIME.

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; TOMORROW WILL BE A REPLICA

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; OF YESTERDAY. TODAY WILL BE

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; A REPLICA OF TOMORROW,

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; YESTERDAY WILL BE THE CROSS

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;WE BURN OURSELVES ON.



&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;THE COLONIZER BLINKS.

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;SPITS U OUT.&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;THE WORLD REPLICATES ITSELF AROUND YOU.

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; EXACTLY HOW YOU

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; REMEMBER &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; IT.

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; THE COLONIZER STRETCHES OUT BENEATH

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;OUR LIGHT,

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;BASKING LIKE A

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;GREAT CAT IN ITS

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;NINTH LIFE,

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;

A working theory of history based on what I learned in the back of my friend’s box chevy on our way to practice in a barren field on irrigation day.

&nbsp;

Nostalgia says: go back.&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;&nbsp;

Wasn&rsquo;t it nice?

Back then?&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;

Weren&rsquo;t there&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;

Flowers?&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;Growing wild?

At the edge of our pen?

&nbsp;

Nostalgia is the most insidious and american complex.

I.

The Cold will make you do any &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; thing,

any, any thing to feel just a little &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; warm.

The Cold has carried me to the bed of more than one &nbsp; &nbsp; stranger,

The Cold has raised my mother&rsquo;s hand to throw at me a&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; knife,

&amp; it was The Cold which told prometheus to defy god and steal &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; fire.

Sometimes I wonder: is there anything that we need in being&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; cold?



II.



When&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; cold,

we will beg, borrow or burn any&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; thing.

Wood, chairs, bones- if freezing, what wouldn&rsquo;t you feed to&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; fire?

Would it be so bad to only&nbsp; ever be&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; warm?

Who here has frost not confronted with its lonely, lonely &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; knife?

Would it be that bad, really that bad, if winter were a&nbsp; stranger?



III.



The &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; Stranger

was&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; cold.

Her &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; knife

cut &nbsp; &nbsp; any&nbsp; &nbsp; thing

to &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; warm

Her&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; fire.



IV.



In the bright light of our burgled fire,

The Stranger

said to us:&nbsp; The Warm

will some day kill The Cold.

We did not believe any thing,

and took her knife.
&nbsp;

V.



Can the future be seen in a&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; knife?

&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;In&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; a &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; fire?

Is there any &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; thing

&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;stranger&nbsp;

than eulogizing &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; cold

while some still cannot become &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; warm?



VI.



like&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; a &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; warm

knife

through &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; cold

butter, &nbsp; &nbsp; we come, &nbsp; again, &nbsp; to the house of&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; fire,

&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;this time&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; stranger,

&amp; ready&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; to do any,&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; any thing.



/ /&nbsp;

Some day, our great grandchildren will meet us in the shadow of the &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; fire,

and we will say,&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; as if to a stranger:

cold will make you do any,&nbsp; any thing.

&nbsp;

The Cold/ / any, any thing

children, younger than fear

and not older than the millennium,

dove into the parks

and swam.

&nbsp;

wren cuidadx romero-gilhooly

a light

A working theory of history based on what I learned in the back of my friend’s box chevy on our way to practice in a barren field on irrigation day.

Nostalgia is the most insidious and american complex.

The Cold/ / any, any thing

when phoenix flooded